The Spectre
by Kethrielle
Summary: This was written following a request for a story where Nihlus survives the Eden Prime mission. Now a multi-chapter work in progress.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: Here's the first intermission/request story! The requester asked not to be named, but the request was for a story where Nihlus survives Eden Prime. I really liked the idea, so it may turn into a multi-chapter monster at some point. But this should be good for now.**_

* * *

This was a call he just knew was going to be awkward. Reluctantly, but knowing that delay would only make things worse, Nihlus accepted the incoming call from his mentor and friend, Saren.

"Good morning, Saren. Or is it afternoon where you are?"

The scowling image of his mentor did not change with the pleasantry.

"Nihlus. I just heard about your recent recommendation for Spectre candidacy. What were you thinking?"

Nihlus barely managed to keep the scowl from his own features; long experience had taught him that showing his own frustration only made Saren angrier.

"It's a solid recommendation. You know that the Spectres have accepted people with fewer accomplishments in the past. Your objection is based solely on her race."

"And you don't think that's enough? Humanity is presumptive; demanding respect and privileges they haven't earned. What you suggest will compound the problem!"

"Or perhaps it will not affect the problem in any way, Saren. You're assuming that all humans have the same mindset. Perhaps by getting to know more of them as individuals, we'll all learn differently. Perhaps this will give the humans an opportunity to earn the respect that they have been demanding. Have you looked over my reports? Her service record is flawless."

Saren's mandibles clamped tightly against his jaw, his sub vocal tones rumbling with anger.

"Yes, her service record. A record kept by the human military, provided by human diplomats, who want a human Spectre. I do not find that particularly persuasive."

Nihlus bit back a sigh, and struggled to keep his own sub vocal tones calm.

"I can see that this conversation is getting nowhere. I had hoped you would at least trust my judgement, even if you distrust humans and the information they've provided. I am positive there were those who thought you foolish for recruiting me. Regardless, I will not be swayed. My recommendation does not require your approval, nor do I. I would have liked it, but I will not withdraw my support for Commander Shepard's Spectre candidacy simply because you disapprove of humans. Thank you for your time, Saren."

As he leaned forward to terminate the connection, Saren spoke again.

"You will regret this, Nihlus. Where humans go, death and destruction follow. This will not end well for you, Nihlus, you may be sure of it. I am trying to protect you."

Nihlus didn't even bother responding, he simply cut the connection.

….

A few days later, Nihlus stalked scowling through the Normandy, ready to concede that at least some of Saren's dislike of humans may have a foundation. He certainly didn't feel welcome on the Normandy; most of the crew ignored him completely, while some were downright hostile. Always respectful - they were well trained after all - but definitely not happy to have him there.

He had to admit, he could see their point. Having a council spectre on a routine shakedown cruise practically screamed "there's a secret here!" He was interested to see how Commander Shepard would react to his presence; they would pick her up later today at Arcturus Station.

In the meantime, he had been offered the Captain's quarters on board the ship, and he was well practiced at keeping to himself. He'd spent most of his life standing at a distance from his fellows - even fellow turians - and as a spectre he tended to work alone, so it was an experience that stood him in good stead. It had occurred to him, usually when he was butting heads with his friend and equally solitary mentor, that there might be a better way; but he rarely spent time on such useless thoughts.

When the pilot's voice came over the comm speaker, announcing their arrival and imminent docking at Arcturus Station, Nihlus nodded to himself and stood up. He headed towards the airlock, taking a position from which he could be easily seen, but not an immediate part of the proceedings. He knew that welcoming a new XO on board would be something of an event; he wanted to observe the humans around him, and Commander Shepard particularly, but he always wanted to ensure that no one gave her an idea that this might be more than a common shakedown cruise. It wouldn't do for her to know too soon that she was being evaluated.

….

Commander Shepard stood stiffly at attention, as the airlock finished cycling through it's decon procedure and the door slid open. A fairly large group of people were standing in the small space beyond the airlock, but Shepard's eyes immediately locked on Captain Anderson at the front of the group, and she snapped to attention.

"Commander Grace Shepard reporting for duty, sir."

Anderson nodded calmly, his smooth voice dispelling the slight tension she felt at beginning this posting.

"Welcome aboard the Normandy, Commander. It's a pleasure to have you here."

"Thank you sir." She relaxed slightly at Anderson's nod, bending to pick up her gear bag before stepping onto the ship for the first time.

A round of introductions followed, Shepard automatically storing names, faces, and ranks for future reference. Navigator Pressly, Dr. Chakwas, Lt. Alenko. The pilot, Joker, who didn't stand, but offered a half-serious, half-mocking salute from his chair. The entire time, half her attention was focused on the turian leaning in the shadows against the far wall, watching.

Commander Shepard had met turians before; she'd been bouncing around the galaxy on Alliance ships since she was born, after all. She'd never seen one who was quite so physically striking, though. With dark red plates, bright green eyes, and the most graceful colony markings she'd ever seen, this turian certainly caught her eye.

When Captain Anderson turned to lead her through a tour of the ship, he caught sight of the turian for the first time. A slightly surprised look crossed his face, but she couldn't tell what had caused it. Nonetheless, he waved a hand at the turian.

"Commander Shepard, this is Spectre Kyrik. The Council sent him along to observe our shakedown cruise. Spectre, this is my XO, Commander Shepard."

The spectre stepped forward, offering Shepard his hand in the human gesture of greeting. She shook his hand with no evidence of surprise that he knew the gesture, and none of the obvious concern most of her species showed with physical contact with a turian. Interesting. Before he could consider her attitude further, Captain Anderson was speaking again.

"I hope you'll excuse us, Spectre, I was just about to show Commander Shepard around the Normandy."

Nihlus didn't have a chance to process the smooth dismissal before Shepard was speaking up.

"Actually, sir, if you don't mind, I wonder if Spectre Kyrik might join us? If you have time of course," she added as she turned her attention back to Nihlus. "The ship was designed by both our people; I would appreciate your input on the turian aspects of the design, and the reasons for them."

Nihlus looked closely at her. It was an intelligent request, certainly, but did she have an ulterior motive? He didn't have time to determine the answer right then, the two human officers were waiting for his answer.

"Of course, Commander, anything I can do to help."

He nodded to Anderson, and when the Captain stepped past him, he and Shepard fell in behind and to either side as they followed him around the ship.

….

Two hours later, his suspicions were completely allayed. Commander Shepard didn't need ulterior motives, she was terrifyingly thorough. Not only did she know everything about the ship that was included in the specs, she had a good working knowledge of turian ships and protocols, how they affected the design and layout of the ship, and how they would interact with the human military practices. She was well on her way to knowing all the crew members - by name - and something of their service background.

Nihlus had the feeling that if she'd had any previous knowledge of his presence aboard the ship, she would have investigated him just as thoroughly. That she hadn't spoke to her lack of foreknowledge. He didn't expect that to continue, though; there weren't many records available about him, but he was fairly sure she'd get what she could before they next met.

Captain Anderson brought the tour to an end outside the crew quarters. Commander Shepard glanced around, one eyebrow raised questioningly.

"For the the shakedown run, I offered my quarters to Spectre Kyrik. Since he accepted, I took your quarters. Dr. Chakwas offered hers for your use. They're smaller than the XO quarters, but Dr. Chakwas says she's just as happy to sleep in the med bay if there's nothing catastrophic going on, so you'll have them to yourself. We'll play musical rooms again later."

Shepard smiled. "As long as it has a bed, I'll be fine, sir. Thank you for the tour. What time am I on duty?"

"Not until 0700 tomorrow, Commander. Take some time to settle in and relax." He nodded to Shepard, and to Nihlus. "I'll see you in the morning, Commander. Spectre."

As Anderson walked away, Nihlus turned his attention back towards Shepard. She was watching him, and her eyes met his easily when he looked at her. Something about that was rather… unsettling.

"Thank you for your insights on the tour, Spectre Kyrik. I appreciate the time you've spent. I won't keep you any longer. Perhaps I'll see you tomorrow? I believe we'll reach Eden Prime the day after."

"Indeed, Commander. I'm certain we shall run into each other before then. Excuse me."

Turning, he made his way back to his quarters. There was something about this human that he couldn't quite name, but it made him slightly nervous. He'd been too aware of her quiet, observant presence next to him throughout the tour; too aware of the way her warm brown eyes watched him steadily, reading not just his words but his posture, his gestures… she certainly had an uncanny way about her.

She would make an excellent spectre, he was still convinced of that, but for the first time he began to wonder: did he really want to spend the next two or more years in constant close contact with her?

….

For the first time since coming aboard, Nihlus was appreciative of the way the human crew ignored his presence. A large, armored turian couldn't really be called 'inconspicuous,' but the Normandy's crew made an effort to ignore him, and the result was almost the same. As long as he stayed out of Commander Shepard's way, he could watch her without drawing her notice.

Mostly, he evaluate her on a professional basis. She was clearly comfortable with her position of command, and she had no problem dealing with the myriad personalities of the other Alliance crew members. From the over-eager Corporal Jenkins, to the the star-eyed Lieutenant Alenko, to the surly pilot. Shepard worked with or around each of them, quietly directing their attention where it was needed; gently deflecting hero worship, attraction, and brittle humor. If her combat skills measured up to her people skills, Nihlus knew she would be an outstanding spectre.

At the same time, he couldn't help by observe her on a personal basis as well. He was surprised to find that she was as much an outsider among this crew as he was among his fellow turians, though for entirely different reasons.

He was an outsider because of double birth-sins of location and association. To be born on a small outpost outside of Hierarchy space was bad enough; those turians whose parents had possessed the good sense to live within Hierarchy space cast superior and suspicious looks at him. To be born on a _mercenary_ outpost was even worse; it practically guaranteed that he had no honor, no loyalty, and no idea of what proper turians considered important. Though he wore his mother's clan markings, and had entered the military at her insistence, he was his father's son. He'd learned fighting and tactics from one of the best merc commanders around, a fact which often got him in trouble when his father's unorthodox teachings proved effective, but not popular with his commanding officers.

Commander Shepard though, was an outsider for almost the exact opposite reason. She was everything a commanding officer wanted in a soldier. She had a determination that never balked at challenges, a natural ability to read people and situations and make quick decisions, and a charisma that made people want to follow her and impress her. Combined with a frightening attention to detail and a dedication to constantly surpass her own best skills, these qualities made her a rare commodity. But they also made everyone who worked with her feel as if they were being judged against her - and found wanting. Everyone wanted to be on her team, whether it was for combat drills, skill checks, or maintenance work; but there was always a sliver of resentment when she led them successfully.

He hadn't known what to expect, really. That she didn't quite fit among her people didn't bother him - it would most likely make becoming a spectre more appealing; many spectres preferred to work alone, and embraced the opportunity of doing things their way without the red tape of a chain of command.

But somehow, seeing that she was as isolated in her own way as he was in his, planted some thoughts that he didn't want to acknowledge. Would their strengths and weaknesses mesh well? He suspected they would; if he thought about the odd feeling that had tingled through him when her warm brown eyes had met his, he suspected they would work together all too well.


	2. Chapter 2

They'd reached Eden Prime, and _big surprise_, Spectre Kyrik wasn't just there to watch the stealth systems in action. Commander Shepard had fought hard to keep both her voice and her expression neutral when Captain Anderson had informed her of the subterfuge.

The real reason for his presence on the Normandy had come as a surprise, though. She'd never even thought about the spectres, aside from knowing about their existence. She wasn't sure the idea appealed, really - too much responsibility with too few rules was a recipe for disaster in her book - but in the end it didn't matter. If humanity wanted her to do this (and, more importantly, if _Anderson_ wanted her to do this) she would.

Of course, if a shakedown mission could turn into a rare artifact pickup mission in the blink of an eye, it really shouldn't have come as a surprise that a pickup mission could just as quickly become something else again. So now here she was on Eden Prime, with Lt. Alenko beside her, Corporal Jenkins dead behind her, and an unknown type and number of hostiles ahead of her.

Oh, and somewhere out there was a single Council spectre, "moving faster on his own," and hopefully not getting himself killed. Shepard rolled her eyes. Why couldn't anything ever just be easy?

When they ran into Chief Williams, they caught their first break. Familiar with the colony, not a civilian, and not panicking. A good combination. She had Williams take the lead, and they moved quickly toward the spaceport.

By taking a shortcut Williams knew, they actually arrived before Spectre Kyrik did. There was movement down there, though, so Shepard had Alenko and Williams set themselves up in concealed positions, while she found a sniper perch and settled there, well above the spaceport.

She scanned the spaceport methodically, until she caught movement. Flicking the scope to its highest setting, she studied the form pacing an open area. Turian, but not Kyrik. This turian was silver plated, with a distinctive facial structure she'd never seen before. When his impatient pacing faltered, she widened the view on the scope, and saw Spectre Kyrik approaching him.

Kyrik seemed on edge, but his body language clearly said he trusted this new turian. The two spoke for a moment, then Kyrik paused thoughtfully, staring off into the distance as the unknown turian paced behind him.

The next second, Shepard was keying her comm, and yelling, "Kyrik, **_duck_**!"

….

Nihlus heard the comm crackle to life, and Shepard's unexpected shout. He reacted without thinking, dropping into a low crouch and spinning to put his back to some crates. Even as he moved, he could hear the whistle of a bullet passing through the air where his head had just been.

Trying to get a grasp of the situation, he looked around. Seeing the gun in Saren's hand, he was first relieved, then stunned into motionlessness as his mentor brought the gun down and around to aim at him. _Again_, he realized detachedly, _Saren was aiming at him again_.

As he stared at his friend, disbelief written over his features, a second bullet whistled through the air. This one lodged itself in Saren's throat, and Nihlus watched as Saren fell, his gun dropping, blue blood spraying from the wound. Standing, Nihlus glanced around.

There were two humans advancing carefully towards his position; both had guns drawn, but held in the ready stance that meant they hadn't been the ones to shoot Saren. He recognized one as Lieutenant Alenko from the Normandy, the second he didn't know. He caught movement from the corner of his eye, and lifted his gaze to the top of a building about 900 yards away. Just standing from a prone position was Commander Shepard, a sniper rifle cradled easily in one arm. She had done this.

As Shepard started to climb down from the building, Nihlus turned back to Saren. Finding his mentor still drawing a few tortured breaths, Nihlus knelt beside him, reaching for medigel he knew would only be wasted.

Saren coughed and drew a gurgling breath, fighting to speak.

"Sovereign… indoctrina-...Sorry, Nihl-."

As the light faded from his friend's eyes, Nihlus heard footsteps behind him. Standing, he spun, leveling the full weight of his glare at Shepard.

"You shot him!"

She raised an eyebrow, watching him closely for a moment. "Yes, I did."

"This is Saren Arterius; he's a Council spectre, he was my mentor - my friend. What were you thinking?"

Shepard's eyes narrowed. "What was _I_ thinking? I was thinking that he tried to shoot you! Twice!"

Clearly, she didn't understand what she'd done. "He was a Council spectre. You can't just go around shooting people without knowing all the details! You made a huge mistake, Commander!"

His shouting had diverted the other two humans from their search of the spaceport; they were focused on him and their commander now, weapons ready but held loosely in their hands.

The weapons snapped up to point at him when Shepard stepped over to stand right in front of him, their armored chests almost touching.

The movement shocked Nihlus for a moment. Turian social customs strictly observed the concept of personal space. Friends stood at one distance, acquaintances at another; family stood closer, and mates stood the closest, but only in private settings. To invade another's space this way, in this context, to this degree, could be seen as nothing but a challenge.

Nihlus' mandibles pulled tight against his face in anger, but before he could respond to the challenge, or give her a chance to prove that it wasn't a challenge, Shepard was speaking.

"A huge mistake? Well, I'll be sure not to do that again. Tell me, was the mistake saving you from the first bullet, or the second? Just tell me, so I know what to do. Next time, would you prefer to be warned about the first bullet, so you can see the second coming? Or should I just let any random idiot with a gun put a bullet in the back of your trusting head without saying a word about it? Please, tell me which of those was the mistake."

Shepard crossed her arms over her chest, ignoring the sound of her armor scraping against his, and the pressure as her arms pushed against his chest when she took up more of the narrow space between them. She wasn't about to back down; she knew exactly what she'd done by closing the distance between them, but she needed him to stop reacting and think, and this had been the first solution that had occurred to her.

Well, the second actually, but she doubted punching him would have gone over well.

….

Nihlus stared down at the human woman who was so casually challenging him. His attention slowly turned away from surprise that Saren was dead, toward the shocking fact that this human had now challenged him three times: once by stepping into his personal space, a second time verbally by arguing with him; and now a third time, with her crossed arms pressing into him and her firm stance not giving way, she was basically insisting that he step back and give in. She either knew far more about turian culture than he'd imagined, or she had nearly omniscient instincts.

He took the step back to give himself time to think. His eyes darted to Saren's body, then up to Shepard. For the first time, he looked back to the building she'd been on when this happened; he realized it was a challenging shot, but she would have been able to see everything. With that realization, the rest of her comment clicked; _or should I just let any random idiot with a gun put a bullet in the back of your trusting head_, she'd said. Which meant that she'd seen what he hadn't, Saren had meant to shoot him from behind. No warning, no conversation, no honor. No consideration for their years of friendship.

Nihlus took a deep breath, then nodded, not quite able to meet Shepard's steady gaze.

"You're right, Commander, of course. My apologies. I have never been almost executed by a friend before, I wasn't thinking. We should see to the beacon."

He turned away from her, trying to ignore Saren's body. His mind was awhirl, trying to think of explanations for his friend's behavior; some reason that the other spectre had tried to shoot him from behind. He tried to remember what Saren had said. Anything to give him a clue as to what had happened.

….

With the confrontation over, the two Alliance soldiers had begun walking cautiously around the beacon, talking to each other and ignoring him and Shepard. Nihlus followed their gazes; the beacon was... glowing; it was active.

Just as he realized this, Shepard shoved past him; she was running towards Alenko, who was somehow getting pulled towards the beacon. Shepard grabbed him, throwing him free of whatever field had gripped him. As the second Alliance soldier knelt beside Alenko, Nihlus stared at Shepard.

Her body had been lifted off the platform, she hung loosely in the air for seconds that felt like hours. With a burst, the beacon released her and exploded. Nihlus ran to Shepard's unconscious form as Alenko called the Normandy for pickup. He lifted her carefully into his arms, noticing absently how slight she was. When the Normandy arrived, he carried her carefully to the med bay, refusing to let anyone help.

….

Shepard woke up with a blinding headache. When she sat up and saw both Captain Anderson and Spectre Kyrik hovering at the far end of the med bay, the headache got a little worse.

Anderson noticed she was awake first, and walked over to her, Kyrik following in his wake.

"Commander, how do you feel?"

She slid carefully to her feet and straightened to attention. "Like I was charged by a dozen krogan, sir." At Anderson's smile, she shrugged slightly. "Could be worse."

"Glad to hear it, Commander. Spectre Kyrik filled me in on what happened down there; sounds like a tangled mess. We're enroute to the Citadel now, we'll see what happens next. Someone is going to have to answer for an entire colony being wiped out. And the Council is going to want to know what happened with that beacon." Anderson's concerned gaze swept over her. "You get some rest, Commander. Doctor Chakwas cleared you for duty, you're back on shift at 0700. I'll expect your report then, too. Well done, Commander."

As Anderson turned and left, Shepard let her gaze drift over to the turian watching her silently. He looked like he wanted to say something, but didn't quite know how. She met his eyes steadily, waiting.

He shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "I want to apologize, Commander. I was out of line down there. I shouldn't have yelled at you."

Shepard offered him a small smile. "Don't worry about it, Spectre. I don't think anyone would be at their best in that situation. I'm sorry I had to push you; I couldn't think of any other way to get you to start thinking again."

He seemed more at ease now that the apology was out of the way; he waved her own apology off. "No, you were fine. It was quite a surprise, actually, but it worked."

She laughed at that, then winced and put a hand to her forehead. "Ow. I think I really should go lie down."

She looked slightly unsteady, so he fell into step beside her. Casting about for something to say, he offered, "So tell me, Commander. Have you ever actually been charged by a dozen krogan?"

Shepard grinned. "Well, it was only two, but my imagination can fill in the blanks." She waited for his responding smile before turning the conversation back to their mission. "So what happens now?"

"The Council will expect a full report on what happened to both your colony and the beacon. They'll also want to know what happened with Saren. I'm not sure what to tell them. He said something at the end: sovereign. There was something else I couldn't understand, but I got a recording of it."

She nodded. "There was something, right before I lost consciousness down there. Some sort of… vision. From the beacon." Shepard shrugged. "I don't know if that's helpful at all."

Nihlus shook his head. "It's useful information, but I doubt the Council will think much of it, Commander."

"Not surprising, really. So after we report to the council, what then?"

"Then we find out why Saren tried to kill me." His voice was grim, she could hear the flanging effect of his sub vocal tones. "And we start with his mistress."

Shepard couldn't help it, both eyebrows rose sharply at this information. "Saren has a mistress?"

Nihlus nodded, his expression making it clear that this had long been a point of contention between them. "Oh yes. An asari matriarch who lives on the Citadel. Benezia."


	3. Chapter 3

**_A/N: I changed the status of this story from "complete" to "in progress," because let's face it - it pretty much demands more. It will update sporadically, though._**

* * *

When Commander Shepard stepped off the elevator, she dismissed Alenko and Williams back to the Normandy, preferring to stalk around the Presidium by herself.

She eyed the Presidium lake thoughtfully; Ambassador Udina would make a lovely splash if she pitched him just the right way from the top of the council tower. Not that the rest of the council was any better, but she had expected the human ambassador to be a little kinder to his best shot at advancement around here. She certainly didn't envy Anderson his extended chat with the man.

As she stomped around a corner, she was surprised to see Spectre Kyrik leaning against a railing near the rapid transit terminal. He had both elbows resting on the top rail, and one booted foot resting on the bottom rail. Even in such a relaxed pose, she could see the tension in his frame. Sighing, she walked over to him.

"So, I'm guessing your meeting with the Council went about as well as mine, eh?"

"You could say that. They gave me leave to speak with Benezia myself, at least."

He looked over at her, and she could see the misery in his bright green eyes. Shepard cursed silently to herself. The Council was the least of his problems. She may only have seen Saren as an enemy, but to Kyrik he'd been a friend.

She set her arms on the top railing, and one foot on the bottom railing, standing deliberately close to him and mimicking his posture.

"Want some company when you go talk to her?"

That actually earned her a chuckle. "I'm sure that would go over so well, Commander. 'I regret to inform you that Saren has been killed in action. And oh, by the way, here's the person who shot him.' Probably not the best idea."

Shepard smiled, turning until she could see his face. "That really wasn't my plan. I just thought you might like some moral support. This conversation is never easy, and with the… extenuating circumstances… it's worse than normal."

"Well, that's true enough." He pushed away from the railing, and walked over to the terminal to call a cab.

She figured he wasn't used to asking for help, but he hadn't said no, so she followed him. When the cab arrived, she slid in without raising the question again; he sat down a moment later, and she saw the slight easing of tension in his shoulders. The ride passed in silence.

When the cab dropped them off at a prestigious apartment building, Shepard raised and eyebrow, but followed the Spectre silently. He led the way into the building, calling the elevator and selecting a floor without pause. Despite his earlier indication of disapproval regarding this asari mistress, he seemed to know his way around well enough.

They reached the correct floor, and were walking down the hallway, when he stopped suddenly, holding out an arm to stop Shepard in her tracks as well. Her eyes met his, and he nodded towards a door.

"That's Benezia's apartment. The door is standing open, which is not usual. Be ready."

Shepard nodded, drawing her pistol as she moved to the wall opposite the apartment door, out of the line of sight of anyone within. Kyrik continued forward, his own weapon drawn and held pointed at the ground.

When he reached the door, he knocked on the frame, calling loudly, "Matriarch Benezia? It's Spectre Kyrik, ma'am. Are you home?"

There was a muffled sound from within, followed by movement and the sound of something hitting the floor. Kyrik threw the door open, ducking around the corner with his gun held in front of him. Shepard followed, turning her attention the opposite direction than Kyrik had.

She cleared her side of the apartment; other than the fact that someone had obviously been searching the place, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. She heard Kyrik's voice, and hurried in his direction.

She arrived in the main living area of the apartment to find the Spectre standing with his pistol pointed at a terrified young asari maiden who had her hands held out to her sides as he barked questions at her.

Walking over, Shepard put her hand on his arm, pushing down lightly. He turned to look at her, and she met his eyes calmly. "The apartment is clear, there's no one else here. Can you lock the door, so we can take our time talking to her?"

He nodded curtly. "Yes, alright. Watch her, I'll be right back." He glowered at the asari before stalking off to lock the front door.

When he was gone, Shepard set her pistol back in its holster, holding her own empty hands up in what she hoped was a reassuring gesture. "We're not here to hurt you. I'm Commander Shepard, Alliance Navy. My friend is a spectre. We're looking for matriarch Benezia."

The young woman still looked frightened, her eyes jumping back and forth between Shepard and where Kyrik had gone to the front door.

"I'm Dr. Liara T'Soni. Matriarch Benezia is my mother."

Kyrik heard that as he came back into the room. "What are you doing breaking in here if she's your mother?"

The young asari twisted her hands together nervously. "I… haven't really spoken to Benezia in years. I usually receive a letter from her every few months, but recently she hasn't been responding to my messages. I was worried, so I came to see her. When there was no answer, I decided to let myself in and see if I could find out what was going on."

Shepard glanced at Kyrik, not sure if she believed the explanation. Kyrik nodded, though, so she turned back to T'Soni.

"Alright. I'm sorry we scared you. We were looking for your mother as well. Do you have any idea where she went?"

Liara shook her head. "Not really. I found a message from someone named Saren, asking her to join him on some sort of mission. It didn't give any information aside from the name of his ship, though."

Shepard sighed. "Well, any information would be helpful. What's the name of the ship?"

T'Soni's hands knotted together nervously again, her eyes flicking back and forth between Kyrik and Shepard. "Why do you want to find her?"

Kyrik stepped forward, clearly uncomfortable with breaking this news to Benezia's daughter. "We came to tell your mother that Saren is dead; he was... killed in action on Eden Prime. If she's not here, I'd like to find her. If she was with him, I'd like to find out if she has any information about why he was there."

The maiden looked to Shepard and then back to Kyrik. "If you're looking for my mother, I want to come with you. I'm worried about her."

Kyrik looked at Shepard, his head tilted slightly; clearly, he was making this one her call. She nodded at T'Soni. "Alright, you can come along for now."

Dr. T'Soni took a deep breath. "The name of the ship was Sovereign."


	4. Chapter 4

**_A/N: Thanks to KaeWhy for pointing out that Nihlus' last name is Kryik, not Kyrik. Which means I've not only been spelling it wrong, I've also been *saying* it wrong all this time. Oops! Poor Nihlus. It will be correct from here on out, but I'm not going to go back and fix the first three chapters because it messes up the alerts. When the story is finished, I'll go and correct all the misspellings. _**

* * *

Nihlus stood just behind and to Commander Shepard's right, listening to the Council with half his attention. The other half of his attention was taken up with marveling at the chain of events over the past two days that led to this moment: Commander Shepard was being appointed by the Council as the first human Spectre.

Shepard hadn't slowed down after agreeing to let Dr. T'Soni join the mission. With little more than the slimmest of leads and an iron determination, Shepard had learned about evidence incriminating both Saren and Benezia, tracked down the quarian who had the information, saved the quarian and convinced her to share the information, and then recruited both the quarian and a krogan battlemaster. Between those tasks, they'd also helped the krogan with a job for the Shadow Broker, and assisted a C-Sec officer with a hostage situation. All in slightly less than two days. Shepard was a force of nature.

Packed full of action they may have been, but those two days had been plenty of time for the Spectre and the Commander to begin to form a rapport.

Shepard had never worked with a spectre before, but if Nihlus was any indication, they were a force to be reckoned with. He was always ready for whatever was thrown at them. He handled even the most unexpected of situations with a calm efficiency that Shepard envied. For someone who usually worked alone - and preferred it that way - he fit himself seamlessly into whatever group she brought with her. As far as planning and tactics when, where she usually found that everyone else was at least a step behind her; Nihlus was either right with her, or a step ahead. Working with Nihlus was an eye-opening experience, and she found herself trusting him more than anyone else she'd ever served with.

And now, here they were, standing solemnly while the Council appointed Shepard to the Spectres, complete with long winded speeches. Besides Nihlus and Shepard, the platform was occupied by Captain Anderson, Ambassador Udina, and Tali'Zorah. Shepard and Anderson stood at attention, their entire focus on the Council; Tali seemed to be paying attention too. Udina appeared to be gloating - he certainly seemed far too smug for someone whose only part in all this was to be the same race as Shepard.

Finally, the Councilors finished their speeches. When their attention turned to him, Nihlus formally agreed to be Shepard's mentor. Udina sent Shepard off with instructions to finish her business on the Citadel before returning to the Normandy, then he stalked off with Anderson in his wake. Nihlus' mandibles clicked quietly; he could just imagine what Saren would have made of the human ambassador.

Shepard glanced up at him and grinned. "So, Mentor, what's next?"

Nihlus chuckled. "To started with, I think you can start using my name; we're about to spend quite a lot of time in each other's company, after all. As far as what's next, we'll have to see what your ambassador wants, I suppose. After that, I'll see about requisitioning us a ship - we'll need one if we're going to be chasing Benezia around the galaxy."

By this time, they'd made it to the bottom of the grand staircase and were headed towards the elevator. Before they reached it, a turian stepped into their path. "Commander Shepard?"

Shepard stopped and arched an eyebrow, her sharp brown eyes sweeping over him, taking in the C-Sec insignia on his armor and his blue colony markings. It didn't take her long to place him.

"You're the C-Sec officer from Dr. Michel's clinic, aren't you?"

He nodded. "Yes ma'am, I'm Garrus Vakarian. I'm also the officer who was working on the C-Sec investigation into Saren's activities."

Nihlus' eyes narrowed immediately at this information, his mandibles pulling tight against his jaw. C-Sec had been investigating Saren? He couldn't stop the annoyed rumble that escaped him. Shepard didn't hear it, but she certainly saw Vakarian's reaction; his eyes snapped to Nihlus, and a sneer crossed his features. Shepard glanced back at him, then spoke up, regaining control of the conversation.

"Thank you again for your help, Officer Vakarian. This is Tali'Zorah, the quarian Dr. Michel was helping. As you can see, we got there in time, and she's fine."

Vakarian glanced at the quarian and nodded politely, but he clearly wasn't interested in her. He shifted his attention back to Shepard.

"There wasn't much to my investigation - everything a spectre touches is classified - but there was enough to show that he was up to something. I listened to your report to the council; whatever Saren was involved in, it's a safe bet that Benezia is as well. There's no way I'll be able to investigate _her_ though. A dirty spectre, sure. It may be difficult, but at least I had the support of my superiors. A dirty matriarch? Never. Pallin would never give me permission to investigate her, and anything I did turn up would be buried before I could write the report."

Shepard crossed her arms and leaned back, listening silently. She looked perfectly at ease, but the motion brought Nihlus fully into her peripheral vision and she watched his expression as Vakarian spoke. His calm facade was gone, he was clearly angry; his anger was just as clearly directed at Vakarian, but she couldn't make out why. When Vakarian stopped talking, Shepard gave him her full attention.

"I'm sorry to hear that, it sounds like a frustrating situation. Regardless, I promise you that she'll be too busy with us to cause you any problems here for awhile." Even though she wasn't very familiar with turian expressions, she could tell that Vakarian had something else on his mind that her empty platitudes.

"Actually, I was hoping you'd let me come with you, Commander. I'd like to see the job through to the end, even if I'm the only one who will appreciate it."

That was unexpected, and Shepard ran her eyes over him again; this time, assessing him as a soldier; he looked competent, and she had seen his marksmanship back in Dr. Michel's clinic. She was just about to agree when Nihlus spoke up.

"No. Absolutely not. This is a spectre operation, not a C-Sec investigation. If we need your assistance, you will be informed. Otherwise, I assure you that this is above your clearance level."

Vakarian's mandibles drew tight to his jaw, his sub vocal tones rumbling with displeasure.

"Oh, a spectre operation; the easiest excuse in the book. It's because he was a spectre that Saren thought he could get away with anything he wanted to." Bright blue eyes deliberately traced Nihlus' colony markings before meeting his green gaze. Vakarian's sub vocal tones started humming with disdain that was just barely not a challenge. "Fortunately, I was speaking to Commander Shepard; I don't see that it's any of your concern."

Nihlus went rigid at the unspoken insult; he drew a deep breath to respond when Shepard pushed between them. She was too short for the movement to break their stare, but the weight of her presence caught the attention of both turians.

"You're not making a good case for yourself, Officer Vakarian. Spectre Kryik is my mentor, as such his recommendations carry a great deal of weight with me. As does this display, frankly. I was inclined to grant your request, but I'm having some serious doubts about whether your skills will make up for the annoyance of constant arguments between the two of you . Nihlus _will_ be an integral part of this mission, your presence is entirely at my discretion. I suggest you take some time to consider whether you still want to be involved. You can meet me at the Normandy in 30 minutes with your answer."

Vakarian blinked in surprise, his gaze flickering from a scowling Shepard to an equally surprised Nihlus and back. He considered arguing, but Shepard's steady gaze made him think better of it. Instead he simply nodded respectfully. "As you wish, Commander. I'll see you there." He turned and stalked away, making sure to avoid even glancing at Kryik.

Shepard waited until Vakarian's armor-clad figure disappeared into the elevator, then turned to face Tali and Nihlus. Before either of them could say something, she looked at Tali.

"Tali, would you mind going shopping for dextro food supplies? With both you and Nihlus onboard, I want to make sure we have enough decent food for you to eat. Here's the payment authorization; tell the merchants to have the supplies packed and ready, and we'll let them know where to send them as soon as possible."

The slim quarian nodded, checking her omni tool to make sure Shepard's authorization had come through. "Sure thing, Commander. Is there anything specific you'd like me to look for, Spectre Kryik?"

Nihlus shook his head. "No, whatever you get will be fine. Thank you."

As Tali made her way toward the elevator, Shepard turned back to Nihlus.

"Alright, want to tell me what all that was about?" She had her arms crossed over her chest and one eyebrow slightly raised as she watched him.

Nilhus scowled. "C-Sec likes to interfere with spectres on the Citadel. They think that we should have to answer to them whenever we're here."

Shepard shook her head. "I get that, and I can see where both sides would find it frustrating, but that isn't what I meant. Why did I get the feeling the two of you were about to start a brawl right here?"

When Nihlus shifted his weight awkwardly and looked away, Shepard's eyes narrowed. She took the small step to the side that put her back in his line of sight. She met his eyes, and was surprised to see that he looked miserable. Her own eyes widened and she put a sympathetic hand on his arm.

"Nihlus? What is it?"

His bright green eyes left her face, and lowered to where her hand rested on his arm. He stood there for several long moments without moving; when he raised his eyes to hers again, his detached spectre mask was back in place. Shepard bit her lip, but didn't push him.

"It's just a cultural thing, Commander. Nothing to be concerned with. It's your call - if you think Vakarian will be helpful, bring him. I'll be fine."

Shepard held his eyes for a minute before nodding. "Alright, then. I meant what I told him, though. If he's more trouble than he's worth, we'll bring him right back here. He isn't mission critical; you are."

She watched him long enough to catch the surprise that flickered across his face; she filed the response away but didn't say anything about it. She took her hand off his arm and turned towards the elevator.

"Let's go meet Ambassador Udina and see what's in store for us, shall we?"

Relieved that she was dropping the matter, Nihlus fell into step behind her.


	5. Chapter 5

Commander Shepard couldn't believe they'd given her the Normandy. She was excited, but that excitement was barely strong enough to get past the guilt she felt over pumping Anderson off his own ship. Oh, they both knew it wasn't any of _her_ doing, but he was out and she was in and it was hard not to feel bad. She let Nihlus stay in the Captain's cabin, and took herself to the XO cabin; it was one thing to have the Spectre in Anderson's room, it was another matter entirely to take it over herself.

Apparently, Admiral Hackett couldn't believe they'd given her the Normandy, either. They'd been barely a day out from the Citadel when he called with a long list of "situations" that he wanted her to check into. Whether he was doing it to remind her that she was an Alliance officer first and a Council Spectre second, or doing it to remind the Council of this she wasn't sure; either way, she knew where her first priorities were, and it was something of a relief to know that the Alliance felt the same way about her.

Normally, she would have been annoyed by the series of small assignments when she had something important to go after, but this time she was rather relieved. She had a ground team who had never worked with each other or her - several of them weren't used to working in groups at all, and she doubted that Liara or Tali had the combat experience the others had. She was actually looking forward to the assignments as a way to evaluate the members of her squad without serious risk.

It was with this thought in mind that she approached Nihlus' cabin this morning. She pressed the alert chime, and waited until she heard him call out an invitation to enter. Shepard did so, smiling at him when he turned from the terminal he was working on to look at her curiously.

"Good morning, Nihlus. We've received a list of assignments from Admiral Hackett. I was wondering if you wanted to go over squad selections with me."

He stared at her for a long moment, then shook his head.

"No, thank you, Shepard. I'm sure you'll choose well. I hope we don't wait too long before going after Benezia, I don't look forward to sitting around the ship while you're taking care of Alliance business."

Shepard raised an eyebrow at him. "Don't worry, you won't have time to get bored. I was planning on bringing you on most of these assignments."

Nihlus leaned back in his chair and stared at her patronizingly. "I appreciate the offer, but I am not interested in helping the Alliance with busy work. I'll wait until we're on a real mission."

Now thoroughly annoyed with his attitude, Shepard walked farther into the room. She leaned against the end of the desk and crossed her arms.

"It really wasn't an offer, Spectre. I have a ground team who have never worked together, including some members who have little to no combat experience. I need to learn everyone's strengths and weaknesses, and we all need to learn to work together."

Nihlus stood up, his mandibles flaring in challenge at her tone. "I know my strengths and weaknesses, and I have no interest in assisting with Alliance ops. I am here as your mentor - for your role_ as a spectre_. I have no particular opinion on your work for the Alliance."

Shepard's eyes narrowed. She uncrossed her arms and slowly straightened. Her eyes locked on Nihlus' and she took a deliberate step forward, closing the distance between them. She had to tip her head back in order to maintain eye contact.

"That is not an option. I will not be including anyone - on _any_ mission - who I have not worked with. There will be no repeats of Eden Prime and '_I move faster on my own_.' You will work with me, and you will be part of a team, or you _will_ find yourself sitting on this ship every time we go out. I understand you're here as my mentor, which is why I was hoping you could offer some insight into the makeup of our teams, and assist with evaluations after each mission. Aside from that, if you have an opinion to offer I'll hear you out, but I will not have my orders questioned. We'll be dropping on the first mission tomorrow at 0800. This is your one chance, be suited up and ready to go, or prepare to become very familiar with this cabin."

Shepard didn't wait for a reply, she spun on her heel and left the room, leaving Nihlus seething - and speechless - in her wake.

….

Despite the rough start, Shepard found that she and Nihlus worked very well together. He had arrived promptly for that first mission, and though he had very little positive to say about their teammates, he worked well with the group. He did have some unconventional tactics that worked rather well; she learned to listen to his suggestions, and act on them. While Shepard was a rather straight forward fighter, Nihlus took a more subtle approach which had served them well on more than one occasion.

They fought so well together, in fact, that Shepard was about to break the cardinal rule of her Alliance training, which was why she found herself standing outside the door to Nihlus' cabin again. Hopefully their meeting would go better this time.

When she entered his room, he was once again sitting at his terminal, this time with a meal balanced on the desk as he worked. Shepard raised an eyebrow.

"Is this a bad time? You look busy."

Nihlus looked up at her with a mandible-flared smile. "Not at all, Shepard, please come in. I was just finishing up a report for the Council. I expect they'll ask me to stop sending reports on every mission soon, since I basically just recycle them with a few name changes. 'Shepard gets results.' 'Shepard shows great concern for the safety of civilians and her team.' 'Shepard has a nearly omniscient ability to read people.' 'Shepard is a consummate professional, treating even missions that could be handled by raw recruits with the same focus and seriousness as more important missions.' Surely they're sick of it."

Shepard narrowed her eyes at him, studying his face. Sometimes, turians were difficult to read, but...yes, she was sure of it. He was laughing at her. She grinned. "Please tell me you aren't really saying that in your reports to the Council." When he only stared at her, she groaned. "Really? They're going to think I hacked your reports and changed them, or brainwashed you, or something."

When his mandibles stretched wide in a grin, she just rolled her eyes. "Don't worry, Shepard, I know what the Council expects, and I know enough to give them what they want along with what they need to know. Being a Spectre requires a hefty dose of politics at times."

Shepard adopted an expression of horror. "It does? Then I quit! Let me out now, while I still have my sanity!"

Nihlus laughed, and let his voice drop to a low drawl, roughened by the sub vocal tones she couldn't quite hear. "There're also explosions…" he offered temptingly.

Shepard sighed. "And that's why I'm in this business to begin with - can't pass up a good explosion. Well, if I'm not interrupting, I wanted to run something past you."

When Nihlus made a gesture to invite her to continue, she brought another chair over to his desk and sat down. He watched in amazement as her demeanor shifted from teasing to an intense focus that he hadn't seen in her off the battlefield. She leaned forward, elbows braced on her knees, and fixed her eyes on him, watching his reactions with all the intensity she'd give an enemy combatant.

"Here's the thing. I was trained to use a three man team. One to lead, two to serve as support and lookout or specialists, depending on what the mission called for. When I bring you with me, though, it doesn't work that way." She leaned back in the chair, and gestured casually between them. "I've always either been one of the support people, or the leader; I've never led a team where one of my support people was an equal. It's left us in an odd position.

"Two leaders doesn't generally work even in theory, but when it's you there with me, it does work somehow. The downside is that we're left with only one support person - and when we need a specialist, it's even worse. I was thinking that we may want to start running a four person team: you and me, and two for support, but I've never done it before. I was hoping you'd have some insight."

Nihlus stared at her, and could only hope that she would interpret his expression as thoughtful rather than shocked. He had noticed that they worked well together, certainly; he would never have guessed that she saw him as an equal. He had gone from dreading working in a team, to hoping that she'd tolerate his methods, and finally had come to the conclusion that Shepard could work with anyone and was very good at utilizing the strengths of her team. He had expected - on more than one occasion - to be taken to task for some of his unorthodox methods of dealing with challenges, but she had never done so.

Slowly, he'd learned to relax around her; she might be military, but she was nothing like the officers he'd served with in the turian military. Those officers had ruthlessly stamped out all hints of initiative in their subordinates. Turian soldiers were expected to excel in their field, but above that they were expected to _take orders_. He'd run into issues throughout his military service because he refused to stop thinking simply because there was a higher ranked soldier available. The fact that he was often right in his assessments and actions was almost worse - as far as his commanding officers were concerned - than if he'd acted on his own and been wrong.

Nihlus realized she was waiting for his answer. He found that he didn't want to let her down when she was so honestly interested in his opinion. He answered slowly, thinking his way through the question as he spoke. "Turian military doesn't generally run small teams - rather, they do, but only the special forces groups. The merc groups tend to run ops in small groups when it's needed… but I can't recall hearing how successful they found it, one way or the other. You're right that it sounds like it shouldn't work - years of military doctrine argue against the idea of equally shared authority in the field." Nihlus shrugged. "But then, your methods are so far removed from anything I have experience with that I wouldn't argue with anything you wanted to try. If you think it can work - if you think I can be helpful in an equal role - I'm willing to try it. We have two more of your Alliance assignments, don't we? Let's try it, and see how it goes."

Shepard smiled. "Thank you, Nihlus, I appreciate your confidence in me. Since you're willing, I thought we'd take Garrus and Tali with us on the next mission. There should be a lot of Geth - Garrus is a great sniper, he can keep them far enough back from our position to allow Tali time to hack some of them. That should make our job easier. What do you think?"

Nihlus clamped his mandibles tightly against his jaw, determined not to say anything negative about Vakarian. They'd been on one mission together, and the tension between them had not eased in the slightest. There was no denying that the C-Sec officer was good with a sniper rifle, no matter how condescending he was otherwise. He gave a stiff nod. "That seems like a solid plan, Commander. When will we be there?"

Shepard grinned as she stood. "Two hours. See you then."


	6. Chapter 6

Just as there was a gun for every situation, Nihlus firmly believed that there was a specific gun to suit every mood. When he was feeling patient and calm, he used a sniper rifle. When he was feeling determined, confident, and just a little bit daring, he used an assault rifle. When he was grumpy and just wanted to shoot stuff, he used an SMG. When he was feeling particularly angry, he used a pistol.

Today was an SMG day.

Shepard and Vakarian were making their way to the sniper perches they'd picked out. Tali was ready to get to the mainframe and retrieve the information they needed; Nihlus' role was to protect her while she did it. There was a long open room between them and the terminal Tali needed, and it was rapidly filling with geth. The plan was for Shepard and Vakarian to clear a path, Nihlus was to make sure that nothing got too close to Tali, and Tali was going to work her magic at the terminal.

The plan was taking too long. More geth entered the room every minute; by the time they reached the terminal, it could be wiped or they could be overwhelmed. So Nihlus drew his Shuriken and glanced at Tali. Seeing that she was watching him, he keyed his comm.

"This is taking too long. Time for a new plan. I'll clear the way; Tali, keep them off my back until we reach the terminal; Shepard and Vakarian, get rid of the stragglers on the outsides."

He didn't wait for confirmation before planting a hand on top of the crate he was using for cover and vaulting over it. He opened fire before his feet hit the ground on the other side.

Either way, he was committed now; teeth bared and mandibles flaring in a dangerous grin, he advanced steadily. The sheer number of fallen geth that surrounded him was gratifying. He could hear Tali's shots behind him; when he risked a glance out to the far edges of the room, he saw geth dropping with precise holes in their heads.

Sooner than he had expected, the sounds of opposing fire fell silent, and they had reached the terminal. Tali got to work while Nihlus scanned the room, watching for any additional enemies. He had just completed his scan when Shepard and Vakarian reached them.

Shepard wore a wide smile. "Good plan."

He couldn't help but return her smile, and as the rush of adrenaline faded, he wondered how much of it had been due to the geth, and how much had been due to worrying about Shepard's reaction.

….

Commander Shepard leaned back in her desk chair, then gave a slight kick to rock it back onto its two rear legs. She hooked a cautious foot around the edge of the desk, then settled herself comfortably, letting the chair bob slightly as she thought.

The four person team was working well, much to her surprise. The ground team had adapted to taking orders equally from her and Nihlus with hardly any pause.

Her human crew had expressed reservations about the sharing of command, but once they'd been on a mission with the new structure, both Kaidan and Ashley had admitted that not only did the plan work, but also that Nihlus was a solid strategist. There hadn't been any more complaints from them.

With Wrex, she had simply told him that this was the way things were, and he could fall in line or leave. He chose to fall in line, and eventually managed to drop the "for a turian" qualifier from his compliments.

Vakarian hadn't had a problem with it, which was not only a relief, but something of a surprise as well.

On the field, Vakarian and Nihlus worked seamlessly together; almost as well as she and Nihlus worked together. Their shared background gave them a ready understanding of the sort of battle shorthand that all soldiers learned. Nihlus' confidence and effective strategies had clearly won him Vakarian's trust.

Off the field was a different matter entirely. They barely spoke to each other; the conversations they did have were charged with tension. Aside from the questions of jurisdictional priority surrounding their investigation, Shepard really saw no reason for their animosity toward one another to continue; but continue it did.

She had been tempted to ask about it, but had run out of time; the missions for the Alliance were complete, the team had experience working together. They were due to arrive at Feros in a few hours.

….

When Shepard finally escaped to her room, she dropped her armor on the floor and slumped against the wall. Five dead colonists. Not an outstanding number, except that they were dead on her watch. Shot by her team. Five colonists.

She'd given the order to spare the colonists. The colonists had fought back though, impeding their progress. Nihlus had given the order to "put the colonists down" when their progress had been slowed to a crawl. Before she could countermand the order rapid shots rang out and the colonists fell; her team had been on their way down to face the Thorian and its asari thrall with no time to stop and argue about the matter.

Shepard sighed. She should go talk to him. They had completed the mission without any extra words exchanged. She'd spoken with the surviving colonists, returned to the Normandy, checked in with the ground team (avoiding Nihlus), and come to her quarters. Slowly, she picked up the pieces of her armor and put them away properly, trying to think of what she should say to him. She had just pulled out a clean uniform when the door chimed.

"Come in."

Of course, it was Nihlus. She hadn't wanted to have this conversation yet, still grimy from the battles they'd fought today and wearing only the bodysuit that went under her armor. She took one look at him, and decided sending him away wouldn't help.

He looked mad. Why would _he_ be mad? Shepard scowled and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Nihlus."

He scowled back at her. "Shepard. What were you thinking?"

"What was I thinking? That we didn't need to kill people who weren't responsible for their actions! That moving quickly at the cost of innocent lives wasn't worth it! Why? What were you thinking?"

"You're going to lecture me about unnecessary deaths? Really? You killed a unique life form! You charged in without considering the options, and without consulting the council! You aren't the at the top of the chain of command, Shepard. As a spectre, you report to the council. You also report to me while I'm your mentor. Unilateral decisions on this scale are not acceptable."

Shepard's jaw dropped. "Are you seriously telling me that you would have done things differently? What, you were going to allow the thorian to live? It attacked us, remember!"

Nihlus scowled. "It attacked because we were a threat. If we had not become a threat, it might have been possible to contain the situation."

"And then what? Turn ExoGeni's research over to the council? Give them the ability to control people's minds? I wasn't comfortable with that kind of power in humanity's hands - you're nuts if you think I'd put it in the hands of the council."

"That isn't the point. You made a decision and acted without giving any thought to your responsibilities as a spectre. You have a responsibility to the council now, Shepard. You can't just do whatever you want."

"Well, since I wasn't about to listen to the council unless they said 'kill the Thorian' I don't think it's a valid point. I will try to include you in my decision making in the future, though. Alright?"

Nihlus sighed. "Yes, alright. Just… remember that you're not in this alone. That's all. You're representing humanity, and humanity wants a wider role in galactic politics. Considering the good of all the races will be an important step towards that goal. At least make it look like you're trying."

Shepard nodded. "I'll remember that. Now, perhaps you can tell me why you thought killing the colonists was a good course of action?"

He shrugged. "They were preventing us from reaching the real threat. The longer the thorian was able to keep us away from itself, the more likely it was to come up with something that would prove lethal to us. In order to end the threat, those colonists had to be killed."

Shepard closed the distance between them, standing close enough that she had to tip her head back to meet his eyes. Nihlus tensed. "Unacceptable. We do not kill innocent civilians. There is no excuse for doing things fast instead of doing things right. No collateral damage. Are we clear?"

Nihlus scowled, mandibles pulled tight against his jaw with displeasure, but he finally nodded. "Fine."

Shepard raised an eyebrow, but decided not to comment. She stepped back, surprised when he let out a shaky breath.

"Is that all, Commander?" His voice was steady enough, but when she looked closely at him, she could read the tension in his shoulders and the set of his head. She had a feeling that if she could hear his subvocal tones, they'd be tight with nerves too.

"It was. Is everything alright? You seem really nervous all of a sudden."

Nihlus let out a bark of laughter and eased farther away from her, leaning against the wall near the door. "Yes, well. The last time I had a disagreement with a colleague, it didn't go so well. For either of us."

Shepard frowned, giving him a confused look. He sighed and elaborated.

"Saren."

It took another minute for her to see the connection, and when she did, her eyes went wide.

"You mean you thought…." her voice trailed off. When she spoke again, she clearly sounded incredulous. "Seriously?"

Nihlus shook his head. "Not exactly. I didn't think you'd do anything, but I couldn't help the feeling. Saren and I had seen thing differently before, but we'd always talked about it. That he was willing to shoot me in the back over that beacon…" Nihlus drew a deep breath; it only trembled slightly. "There was a lot of history between us. I don't really want to get into it, though."

Shepard nodded, and walked slowly over to where Nihlus leaned against the wall. His eyes snapped to her face, and she smiled slightly, raising her hands in the universal gesture to show she wasn't a threat. When he gave a weak chuckle, she took the last step to close the distance between them, and set her hands lightly on his shoulders.

"It's ok. You don't have to explain everything, I get it. There's a lot that we don't know, about what's going on here. With the beacon, with Saren, with Benezia. I don't have the answers, and I can't promise we'll always see eye to eye about things." Her eyes caught his, and held him in a steady gaze. "But I won't shut you out, if you don't shut me out. Fair?"

He didn't answer right away, taking his time to study her face as if he could read the truthfulness of her words there. Finally, he nodded. "Fair. And thank you, Commander. For understanding." He brought his hands up to her wrists, and ran them up her arms to her shoulders.

His gaze never left hers, so he saw something flare in the depths of her brown eyes at his touch. She drew a slow breath, shoulders shifting under his hands. It was that motion which drew his attention to the fact that she was wearing only a bodysuit. His eyes flicked over her, taking in unfamiliar curves covered in snug fabric. When he wrenched his gaze back to her face, the first hint of a blush was staining her cheeks.

He hurriedly dropped his hands from her shoulders, and edged towards the door. Her own hands didn't move, and the drag of her fingers across his carapace - even over the thin material of his shirt - was sufficiently distracting that he missed the door control on the first try.

He slapped at the wall twice more before the door slid open. Muttering incoherent apologies, he fled.


End file.
